I’ve gone AWOL. Life has gotten me busy.
A lot has changed since I started this blog. If it’s not one test, it’s another.
“God does not burden any human being with more than he is well able to bear: in his favour shall be whatever good he does, and against him whatever evil he does.
“O our Sustainer! Take us not to task if we forget or unwittingly do wrong!
“O our Sustainer! Lay not upon us a burden such as Thou didst lay upon those who lived before us!* O our Sustainer! Make us not bear burdens which we have no strength to bear!
“And efface Thou our sins, and grant us forgiveness, and bestow Thy mercy upon us! Thou art our Lord Supreme: succour us, then, against people who deny the truth!” (Qur’an 2:286)
These are some of my favorite verses from the Qur’an, though sometimes in the midst of trials it is difficult to remember and hold on to these words. You feel like you’re in a dark tunnel and you don’t even see the light at the end. That’s probably the biggest trial- not knowing when it’ll be over. It’s much more bearable if you know a week from now it’ll be done with, but where there is no end in sight, it’s so much easier to lose hope.
I ask Allah for hope. And trust.
Of course it’s not always trials. Even though a little over a year ago I was going through one of the biggest trials of my life, the past few months have been the happiest for me (despite the hiccups). Allah blessed me with an amazing companion in the most beautiful of ways.
Tawakkul (Reliance on God) is probably my biggest weakness. I never learn, though Allah has been so gracious to end my tribulations, and maybe that’s why Allah does not give me the light at the end– because He wants me to learn to trust Him, no matter how dark it is.
And so we fluctuate in our faith. One day we feel like we’re the best Traveler and ready for the next challenge. The next day may be one that is difficult. This behooves us to reflect on why that is and how to come to terms.